What is bullying?
Bullying is repeated negative behaviour done on purpose to hurt someone. Often a person or group targets another person or group to make them feel embarrassed, insecure or scared.
Bullying takes many forms, including name-calling, punching and online harassment. And bullying can happen to us at any age, not just in the playground. It can happen at work too. Bullying can take place anywhere - on buses, on the street, at clubs. And the
experience
Experience is when you have learned or tried something before.
can affect our mental health, self-esteem and even future job prospects.
If you are being bullied - or you think someone else is being bullied - you can speak to our friendly advisers for free, in the
Learning Disability
A learning disability is to do with the way someone's brain works. It makes it harder for someone to learn, understand or do things.
Helpline by calling 0808 808 1111.
Information about bullying and what you can do about it
Anti-bullying campaign: Words matter
The "R" word is deeply traumatising to people with a learning disability. It strips away a person’s humanity, and can feel like a physical assault.
Following a Channel 4 documentary featuring an ableist slur in it's title, Mencap called for everyone's support to help make the 'R' word unspeakable.

Anti-Bullying week takes place the second week in November
Odd Socks Day is part of Anti-Bullying week
Odd Stocks Day is usually celebrated at the beginning of Anti-Bullying week to recognise, celebrate and value what makes each of us unique.
In our video Nikki and Lucinda talk about all things socks.
Articles and blogs about bullying
Need to talk to someone?
Our free helpline
service
A service gives people what they need, like healthcare services that help people when they are ill, and support services that give people support.
offers advice and support for people with a learning disability, and their families and carers.
People of all backgrounds and abilities can experience bullying behaviour, but when something sets us apart we are more at risk of being singled out as different, as someone to be picked on.
People with a learning disability often experience bullying behaviour because we are seen as different. We may be picked on for things like:
- speaking or moving differently
- showing emotion differently
- having specialist equipment and support.
Often people are singled out for no real reason at all other than to make someone feel more powerful than them. They might pick on someone who shows loud, excitable or even aggressive behaviour and who is easily provoked. They might try and get them into trouble. Or they might pick on someone for being meek and quiet, seen as an ‘easy target’ or easy to control.
We can also experience bullying behaviour for other reasons aside from disability - like race or sexual orientation. Being bullied because of disability, race or sexual orientation is
discrimination
Discrimination is when someone is treated differently (usually in a bad way) because of things like their disability or their
religion
Religion is to do with the things you believe about the world. For example you may believe there is a god or something else. Examples of religions are Christianity, Hinduism, Islam and Judaism.
.
and is against the
law
Laws are the rules that everyone in the country has to follow. If you don't follow the rules you can get in trouble with the police.
under the
Equality
Equality is when everyone is treated fairly.
Act 2010.
There are lots of different types of bullying. Knowing about the types of bullying can help you spot if it happens to you or someone you care about. All of them can be equally hurtful, and all of them deserve to be taken seriously. Some examples of bullying are:
Cyberbullying
Cyberbullying is when someone repeatedly sends you hurtful messages online or uses technology to upset you. Online bullying behaviour includes:
- mean comments or messages online or on your phone
- pictures or videos of you being shared publicly online that you don’t want to be seen
- blackmail (pressuring you to do something by
threatening
Threatening is when someone says they are going to do something bad to you or others. to post things you don’t want to be seen)
- someone pretending to be you and posting things you didn’t want them to.
Social isolation
Social bullying, also called social isolation, happens when someone or a group of people leave someone out on purpose. This includes:
- ignoring them
- stopping talking when they are around
- not inviting them to social events
- gossiping or talking negatively about them behind their back and trying to get others to join in.
- ruining their reputation
- damaging their personal or professional
relationships
Relationships are about the people in your life. You might have different types of relationships like friendships, family relationships, or a boyfriend or girlfriend.
- embarrassing them in public
- encouraging others to avoid contacting them.
Physical bullying
Physical bullying is any form of unwanted physical contact towards you or your property. This includes:
- pushing
- hitting
- kicking
- tripping
- unwanted kissing or touching
- stealing or breaking things
- being pressured or forced to give money.
Verbal and emotional bullying
Verbal bullying doesn’t leave a visible bruise, but can be just as harmful to us on the inside. This can include things like:
- name calling
- teasing
- threats
- mocking
- imitation
- intimidation
- stalking
- playing mind games and
manipulating
Manipulating is when someone gets you to do something. It can happen without you knowing you are being controlled to do something.
- blackmailing.
Experiencing bullying is different for everyone, and we all react in different ways. Someone might feel alone, scared, hopeless or angry, because the way they are being treated is unfair.
When someone is being bullied, their behaviour may change and they may seem like a different person. This could include:
- being more quiet
- being aggressive
- negative attitude towards school or work and avoiding going in
- not taking part in social activities
- self-harming, eating disorders or other unhelpful ways of coping with painful feelings
- depression and anxiety
- changes in sleeping and eating patterns
- lower self-esteem.
When someone is bullied, it can help a lot just to talk to someone about their feelings and how they’re coping. They might even want to speak to a doctor or therapist to work through their experiences and move on.
There are lots of ways you can get the right support:
- Friends and family: someone you trust to offer support and advice can be invaluable.
- Helpline support and advice from Mencap: our helpline advisors offer a friendly ear and professional advice: 0808 808 1111.
- Peer-to-peer support: join our online
community
A community is the people and places in an area. and meet other people going through similar experiences to yours. Ask your questions, offer advice, be part of the community.
- Therapy or counselling: there is no shame in looking for professional support. Many people who have been through a difficult or traumatic experience see a counsellor to help them understand what’s happened and move forward.
- Legal support: you might need support from the police and lawyers if you are dealing with harassment.
- Medical support: speak to your doctor, school nurse, or learning disability liaison nurse. It can be helpful for someone who's been bullied to speak to a medical professional about how they feel. A doctor might refer them to a counsellor or prescribe medication to help them come to terms with their experience and move forward with their life.
- Teachers and the school: schools should have anti-bullying policies in place. Find out what support they can offer. It might be a friendly chat with someone, or a buddy scheme, for example.
- Employers, colleagues and your
manager
A manager is a boss at work. They tell you what you need to do and give you support if you need it. : someone being bullied at work should find support from their workplace. Find out what support they offer - it might be a helpline, confidential
Confidential means something is private. chat with a trusted colleague, or time off work to help you deal with what has happened.
Organisations
Organisations are groups like companies and businesses.
that can help
- National Autistic Society: a charity for people with
autism
Autism is a disability. Autistic people find it difficult to understand what other people think and feel. They also find it difficult to tell people what they think and feel. Everyone with autism is different. and Asperger syndrome.
- Anti-Bullying Alliance: a coalition of organisations and individuals that are united against bullying.
- BILD: an organisation aiming to improve the quality of the lives of people with disabilities by delivering practical solutions that work for organisations, and for the people they support.
- Contact: a charity for families with disabled children, providing information, advice and support.
- Respond: an organisation that aims to lessen the effect of trauma and
abuse
Abuse is when someone bullies you and does or says something to you that makes you feel hurt, upset or scared. on people with learning disabilities their families and supporters, providing psychotherapy, advice, support and training.
- Ditch The Label: a charity supporting those who have been bullied, and those who are doing the bullying too.
- Childline: a free, private and confidential service for children and young people. Whatever your worry, you can speak to someone online or on the phone anytime.
- NSPCC: call NSPCC confidentially to report any
safeguarding
Keeping people safe from being hurt, abused, or neglected is called Safeguarding. concerns you have. Both Childline and NSPCC can help you report bullying to the police.
- Bullying UK: part of Family Lives, a charity helping parents to deal with the changes that are a constant part of family life.
- Beyond Bullying: information and advice produced by Leicestershire County Council’s Anti-Bullying Team, including a whole section of resources designed especially for people with a learning disability.
- Kidscape: an organisation that gives young people, parents and professionals the skills to tackle bullying and safeguarding issues in the UK.
- Citizens Advice Bureau: an organisation offering free, independent, confidential and impartial advice on your
rights
Rights are the things everyone should be allowed to do like have a say, or go to school. and responsibilities. . They could help you get legal support around bullying and harassment.
- The Samaritans: round the clock support - anytime, any day. Call their freephone number, text, email or visit a branch.
Hearing that someone you love and care for is being bullied is very hard to hear. You might be upset or angry, but it’s important to stay calm and listen to the full story. There are five steps you can take to handle the situation:
- Talk openly about bullying so your child knows how to recognise it and that they can trust you and talk to you about their feelings. People don’t want to make their parents feel angry or sad - if they think you will respond like this, they might not talk to you about their bullying experiences.
- Respond calmly and with empathy - listen, offer a hug and ask them how this made them feel.
- Find out the details, and calmly reassure them that it’s not their fault and they did the right thing speaking to you about it.
- Be sympathetic and ask questions to get details. You can write down what has happened, the dates and times, places where the bullying took place, and if anyone else was around to see it. These details are important, because they will help you explain what has happened to a teacher and take steps to resolve the issue.
- Talk through the situation and help them form a plan of what to do next - empower them to take control and feel safe.
If your child has told you that they are being bullied at school, there are some steps you can take to resolve the issue:
- Talk to the bully: If your child feels that they can talk to the bully and ask them to stop, that is the first place to start. If they feel uncomfortable or unable to do so, speak to their teacher.
- Talk to a teacher: Your child may prefer to talk to their teacher themselves, or they may prefer you to talk to their teacher for them. Make sure you keep talking to your child for updates about how the situation is being dealt with. If you speak to their teacher, stay calm and polite, and explain the details of the situation. The teacher should listen and deal with the situation sensitively.
If the teacher doesn't take it seriously: It can be frustrating when you speak to the school about a bullying incident and they don't take it seriously or take steps to resolve the issue. Schools should have an anti-bullying policy. Find out what it is and have a calm conversation with them to make sure that they are following their own policy. - Write a diary: write down dates, times, any witnesses, who is
involved
Involved is being included in something or taking part in something. and other details that can help you record what is happening and convince the school to act on it.
If the bullying continues: If the bullying continues or you think it is harassment, you can report the abuse to the police. - Support from your local council: Many communities provide local resources to help tackle bullying. The more we become aware of bullying at school, the more likely they’ll take steps to tackle it. Your local council
website
A website is a page you can go to on the internet like Google or YouTube. should have information about anti-bullying schemes.
- Share with the school the government's guidance on tackling and preventing bullying.
- Ask your teacher to arrange for a professional speaker to talk to the whole school about bullying.
- Report ineffective school responses to bullying to a local newspaper. School administrators will be quick to change their attitudes if they think they might look bad in the news.
- Write to the school chair of governors.