When I was 11 I was a flower girl at a wedding and it was like a fairytale, I’ve wanted to get married ever since. I started planning my wedding in my head soon after.I knew I wanted a pink theme, so I’d dream what the day would look like.
I met my now husband Mark at college. We were on the same course, I had a crush on him but nothing happened until I was about to leave a year and a half later, when I plucked up the courage to ask him out. A few years later I had my pink (and purple) wedding. I’m quite determined so when I see something I want, I don’t give up until I get it!
We got married three years ago yesterday. It was a lovely day, I woke up that morning and was giddy with excitement. We were very lucky to celebrate with lots of family and friends, I had a really special moment with my dad and I had my long-wished-for cinderella moment, walking through the big double doors into the registry office ceremony room. It was everything I’d dreamed of.
When I got married I proved that people with a learning disability can be like anyone else, we can have relationships, we can get married. It was hard from me to imagine that I would ever achieve anything I dreamed of in my life. People still have such negative attitudes and a lack of understanding about learning disability. So many people focus on ‘you can’t’ ‘you won’t. But ‘I can’ and ‘I have’, now I am married, have a great job and live an independent and happy life.
The inclusion of a really hurtful question on okcupid’s site shows that these bad attitudes still exist. They ask the question “would the world be a better place if people with low IQs were not allowed to reproduce”. When I saw this question I felt disgusted. I don’t get why that should even be a question!
I remember the overwhelming feeling of love when my niece and nephew were born. That feeling is still there now. Everytime I see them they give me a really lovely kiss and cuddle and tell me what they have been doing during the week. Seeing them grow up makes me so proud and it makes me want children of our own someday, I feel sad to think people think we shouldn’t.
I’ve met some fantastic parents who have a learning disability. With the right support parents with a learning disability can be as good as any other parent out there. That’s why I started this petition, asking okcupid to get rid of the hurtful question and apologise.
I hope that this petition changes okcupid’s attitude. If they just met people with a learning disability and talked to them I don’t think they would believe it was ok to ask this question.