Helping young people reach their goals.
I am a parent of a 10 year old boy, who right from being 18mths old, I knew something was not quite right. I am convinced that he has mild autism but no professionals we have seen will confirm, although I have been told by ed psyc that he has autistic tendencies. I have struggled ever since to get help and more importantly understanding so as not to be labbelled as naughty.
My son struggles socially, his behaviour is very challenging, especially at the moment as we are gearing towards half term and changes in structure effect him,he has some very quirky ways about him,smells/noise etc problems also.He is on school action and does get some additional help.
My point is that because he has not been diagnosed and he does not tick all the boxes.. I have a fear that as he grows older, this label of being 'a naughty,rude boy' is going to stick and I seem to be the only one that can see whats going on, is there anyone else thats gone/going through the same and can suggest where to go next?
Remember that the spectrum for autism is huge, different children will be affected in different areas and to different degrees. Your son sounds like he ticks some of the boxes for an autistic spectrum disorder, but of course it is up to the experts to decide, and they are quick to remind that there are many possible reasons for any given behaviour and autism can be difficult to pin down with some parents waiting a very long time for a diagnosis. You know your own son, though, and should not have to walk away if you don't agree, I would ask for a second opinion.
I'm not an expert, but I , like you, have a child who we suspect has an autistic spectrum disorder and have therefore done a lot of reading up. At first, although we knew something was quite different about him, we had, through ignorance about the condition, thought that it could not be autism as he loves people- I had thought that all children with autism avoided physical contact etc .. but this is not necessarily so, and his odd behaviour towards others, however friendly, can also be a sign of autism.
I recently got talking to the singer from my band who has a son with an ASD, and some of the similarities were very striking, so I phoned my health visitor and she agrees that the behaviour does tick many of the boxes fro ASD, and she's referred him to the Team Around the Child as it's called. Hopefully this will lead to him being properly assessed and diagnosed.
I can really relate to what you said about not wanting him to be labelled 'naughty', my son is 3, but already it's obvious that he is quite incapable of behaving like the other children in certain settings and situations, and prone to episodes of extremely challenging behaviour if pushed to do so, or rubbed up the wrong way. As he is not able to conform to the 'ideal' at playgroup, it stands to reason he will face similar difficulty in nursery, then school, so it's unfair to put him in a situation where he is expected to behave like the 'more typical' children. This is where diagnosis would really help!
I cannot say what would be the best course of action as far as your son goes as I am just at the very start of this journey, but why not try one of the advice lines? If you Google 'autism', there's an autism society which has an advice line, I'm sure they will help you find the right route to take regarding a diagnosis for your son. He still has all of 'big school' to go yet, so it would be well worth finding out if there is an issue. If I were in your shoes, I would certainly be ready for a fight if that's what it takes! It seems to me deeply unfair if it should come to that though!
All the very best of luck.
Dear Zoe
Thanks for your advice, it is nice to know I am not the only one!! I agree completely with what you say, sometimes all is well in his little world and others its like he wants to stop the world and get off!!
I was told by agencies that we have seen that I would be in for a fight, I am not so much trying to get a specific diagnosis as that will provide him limited assistance anyway and at the end of the day he is how he is and I love him dearly, but acceptance and understanding for him, I work in the educ system and been down routes but still seem to hit brick walls with the normal, lets rule out the parents that cant cope stratergie!
It is really sad that at 10 he has even got to this stage and Im still trying to fight the system and feel that I may fail him but not trying hard enough.
I have read books till Im blue in the face and at diff milestones of his life I could tick 75% of all the indicators of autitic traits, spinning toys, no imag, social troubles, structure,routine, literall thinking, no eye contact, unaffectionate,, lining up things, etc but still no one will confirm as he saves all his anger,frustration,violent tendencies for me, at home.
I will def look into your advice and thank you again.
i have a son who i think as mild autism but the medical people will not confirm it they say it is more learning difficulties and lack of confidence i dont agree but it is like banging your head against a brick wall trying to talk to them
Dear Lorrie
I know where you are coming from, the confidence card has been played when I have tried on countless occassions to get someone to listen to me. The thing is, yes, my child and children who we suspect have mild autism are lacking in confidence and this, as everyone should recognise is a result from the social interaction and communicative problems that children with autism have,. The autism causes the lack of confidence as in my child, he is very aware that he finds things difficult but does not understand why., so therefore, thinks he is stupid and lacks confidence and self esteem. The lack of confidence is not the cause of the problem bu the result of the underlying problem.
I just wish that as parents we are listened to and trusted to be a good judge of our children and their issues.
Simba
hiya, boy your story sounds so much like mine the system is often very hard to break into . i have a 7yr old son whom since around the age of 2 and half we have known something wasnt right.... it has taken all this time to get a diagnosis and in the meantime i feel my son has lost out on huge amounts of support that perhaps could have stopped the difficulties he is now experiencing.... alfie has seen paediatricians,cafs,camhs,doctors, to name but a few....Alfie was labelled by other parents,children etc as a mean naughty little boy which is heartbreaking in feb this year we moved to the midlands from the south east and i can honestly say it was the best thing we have done alfie has now been diagnosed with adhd and is also on the autistic spectrum... the paediatrician,school etc have been fantastic.... alfie can be very aggressive , he is controlling , impulsive,has alot of repetitive behaviours and is sensitive to smells,noises,fabrics etc he also takes everything you say literally ie you tell him to turn round on his chair properly and hell keep turning round on his chair because that is what he thinks you have asked him to do ! I really hope you get the help and support you need it has taken me 5yrs and we are only just at the start of the process his next stage is to get a statement o f educational needs as his behaviour is somewhat challenging and he is a tleast a year behind his age group. We are parents and we know when things arent right i just wish these profesionals realised this. Good luck i hope you and your son get the help you need x
I am 25 years old and when I was born my parents knew something was not right. The doctors took me away and were testing me on different things and came back to my parents and said that there was something wrong but they were not quite sure what. They said it could be dyspraxia but it could also be autism, saying she won't achieve any thing and sent my parents away. I have achieved things but I find it difficult to make friends and socialise, I'm coping, but I'm at my wits end sometimes. I have a problem with my co ordination still as well and maths. Does this sound similar and does any one know if it sounds like dyspraxia and autism together.
Hi Abmonster, I am sorry to hear doctors did not follow up on their conclusion that "something was wrong, but they were not sure what". It must have been very confusing for your parents & it seems it still is a problem for you. I wonder whether the responses to your posting in May were of help as you still seem to be asking the same questions. From what you say It appears that you are looking for an up to date diagnosis for your condition and this can only really be confirmed by a qualified medical professional after a thorough examination. If you would like to discuss your issues further with someone who may be able to advise you on what you can do about them could I suggest that you try calling the Learning Disability Helpline on 0808 808 1111 or email them on help@mencap.org.uk Bobn
Hi Simba,
I have just found this site and wondered if you could contact me please. You have just described my son exactly. I have not been able o describe him as clearly as you have. I am really fighting the proffessionals for some official help for my son and am at the point of dispear.
Thanks. x
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hI Justine, sorry havent been on for a while, please give me some contact details and I will be pleased to speak to you, going through the worst time at the moment so be nice to speak to others.
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Its been a while since i have last been on the website, things have been really bad, my son has nearly been suspended from primary as he decamped three times from school in one afternoon, purely because he said 'n' comes at the end of question and not a question mark. It would take too long to list all the individual things that he has done or have happened...
The schiool have finally realised something major is wrong and are trying desparetely now, as a race against time to contact paediatricians and get a diagnosis of autism as they all agree he has..
He has dived into 14 foot of thorns to get his personal ball back, with no regard to his safety, as he names his possessions ie ballie, this happened at an after school club and I had to get him out ..he sees no danger is completley blinkered.
We have had so many times like the above that it would take forever to record.
i AM AT A LOSS, I DO NOT KNOW WHERE TO GO FROM HERE, THE HEADTEACHER THINKS HE IS AUTISTIC, ALL STAFF AGREE, HIS CLASS TEACHER AGREES, THE ED PSYCH SAID HE HAD AUTISTIC TRAITS - BUT NO ONE WILL HELP HIM AND DIAGNOSE TO GET HIM THE UNDERSTANDING HE DESERVES!!
All family members cannot believe we are still struggling with the outside help or diagnosis, or at least understanding.
The Nat autistic webise has told me to look for places where they offer diagnosis, there is nothinganywhere near our area.
I now am getting to the stage, where I wish to pay privately for my son, if anyone has any previous experience that may help for a route via this option, please advise, many thanks
Simba
I can relate to your frustrations and despair. My son has 2 other disabilities and I have suspected he has autism on top of those for many years.
I proved the authorities wrong last year when, after 6 years I got a diagnosis for my son's "immature gait" as actually being cerebral palsy. A further MRI scan last year confirmed that he has brain damage. The "professionals" argued with me for 4 years about his crawling and walking pattern and last year, the whole team of them were proved wrong. I would urge you to stick by your gut instinct and fight and fight and fight for what you believe in.
I am also going through the fight to get a diagnosis now for the diagnosis of an asd which I believe my son has. From what I understand, whilst it does not automatically mean extra help, it does give you more clout to fight for help and in turn help your child to have a better life. I am not interested in labels but I have come to realise that life is really tough if you have a learning difficulty and that the carers and parents have to fight to prove they need extra help.
I found the NAS to be very helpful - they advised going to my GP as a first port of call - I have been again today to ask for a second opinion and the second GP was determined he was going to help me. The first gp was rude and obnoxious last week. Mencap were very helpful in encouraging me to ask for a second opinion. I can safely say that I felt relieved to be listened to today and I now feel that I am going to be referred to a specialist who can hopefully diagnose my son and that we can all move forward.
I have also started to video his obsessions and behaviours and rituals he has to follow every day so that instead of explaining the frustration, i can show it. I also write down everything that makes me think of why he has autism. After being asked last week by the rude GP why i wanted to know if my son was autistic, I have decided that it is better to be able to answer every question like that with a full and comprehensive answer.
I wish you all the luck in finding a solution and in obtaining a diagnosis. if it's any help, you are not alone and I share your frustrations completely.
Fw
Hi Fw, thanks for reply..
We have finally had a breakthrough, we have an appt this week with Paed, I have reports from head teacher, class teacher, family members and myself that all tally and link and agree with concerns.
It is as though someone has lifted a huge weight off my shoulders, acknowleding that it is not just me who can see something is wrong.. for years i thought i had caused whatever issues my son has but now i am fighting hard to get the support he deserves.
It has been 11 years of hard slog, hints and suggestions of my parenting skills which are totally unacceptable and incorrect. I have a 9 year old who goes through life with no problems what so ever and actually is extemely sociable, confident and popular.
If you know that something is wrong, you have to fight the system, it is so wrong, but thats how it is, I am confident, but tinged with frustration that it has taken me 11 years to get to this point, not for others - DO NOT GIVE UP
Just wondered how you were getting on, have you had the appointment yet? I met a lady who's son has just been diagnosed at 16 having been home-schooled so there's hope for everyone. We just received a diagnosis last week of ASD so we are releived to have that long path behind us finally. Don't let them talk you out of it or throw you off by suggesting that they get the same help either way (we experienced a lot of this), they don't! There's loads more help available once they are diagnosed, groups, courses, workshops and not least the financial support you are entitled to in the form of benefits. Also, alfie had been refused a school place at the school where he attends nursery and we had no reply to the appeal letter. The very next day after writing a follow up letter with the news of Alfie's diagnosis, he was given a place. Keep going!
Hi Zoe
We have had progress but it is still slow going, paed has sent a report stating that my child is diagnosis pending and until appt through ( which will be after he starts secondary!) he is to be treated as an autistic child and all staff at secondary need to be made aware of this. So, there does seem to be a little light at the end of the tunnel, as this is in writing I feel really emotional as finally people are listening to me and confirming what I have battled with for 9 years. I work in SEN and my collegues cannot believe no support or attempt to diagnose has been forthcoming, If I could not get through being 'In' the system, there seems little hope for others, but I agree you must never give up.
Things with my son are taking a turn for the worse, he is running out of class nearly every day now and hiding in cupboards or anywhere where he can find peace. He states that he can feel episodes building and is being allowed out of the class as and when for time out.
I have also had suggestions that perhaps I should look into schools offering more support, that was weird as I hadnt even thought like that about my son, but we will see. As benefits etc are concerned, I did not even realise this was an entitlement and would refuse any benefits as this is not what I want for my son and will not make any difference to him, it is purlely the understanding and support.
Thanks for replying, take care
My son is 24 and was born with a left haemiplegia, (which is like a stroke) he developed Epilepsy at age 6 which eventually became Grand Mal. he was a wonderful, happy child till he hit 16 then changed into a very grumpy and rude teenager. he was sent to a special needs school which developed his skills, although socialising was not his best. still isn't! Because of sickness in school he wasn't allowed to proceed to college and fell out of touch with all education. Because of different problems he was put in touch with a specialist doctor who diagnosed him as having High Functioning Autism. He was 21 years old! I was totally shocked! But when I looked back over the years I could see the signs. obsessional tidiness. didn't like cuddles, even as a baby. Didn't understand jokes, even simple ones. If something came to his mind he wanted to do nothing would stop him. Although it was a bit of a relief to know I still didn't have an easy time. His epilepsy caused him to have severe learning disabilities so FRUSTRATION has become a major part of our life. He has now been living in his own flat for 3 years with my help. It hasn't been easy. He frequently gets hassled by stupid people (adults as well as children). This has been the biggest problem as he gets very angry and retaliates and often it is him who ends up in trouble with the police. Sometimes the police are helpful and others completely useless.
Finally, I would like to hear from people with youngsters like my son, and hear how they cope.
thanks for listening
Hi
Although my son is only 11 it took me nine years to get somewhere, even though I knew at 2 that something was not right. I feel for you that you have gone along further than I have and it must be a mixture of relief, despair and frustration. Im still battling with professionals ..
I fear for the future so know where you are coming from, take care
I have a 3 yr old son who we suspect to have either some form of learning difficulties or possibly a form of autism. We aren't sure what to expect of either outcome, we know two other parents who have autistic children, 1 is mild and quiet & can speak a small amount & the other is agressive, very 'constant' (not sure how else to describe) and can't speak at all. Our son has similarities to both these children who too are boys, but is not exactly alike them, does that mean he isnt autistic? He can speak....just. He can say a small 3-4 worded sentence? He can sometimes keep eye contact, he doesnt make any significant noises but does do a rocking back an forth thing occassionally. He does have certain rituals he must do if they are broken or changed in anyway he gets very upset. He is quite aggressive at times but seems to save most of his aggression for home and focuses on myself or his dad but more so to his twin. Is this a 'trait' of autism?
We have started the ball rolling to look for answers but it seems to be a long haul process (as most of you already know). We have had the SOG's assessment done by our health visitor and it confirmed he was roughly 9-12mths behind his age group, is this significant? We thought having autism meant you would be much futher behind? Can this also be wrong? We know from him attending nursery school he isnt performing as well as his peers and that he is unable to form social bonds. He does seem to be mostly a happy little boy, he does however not like people to kiss his mouth unless he kisses you, and even then he will mostly kiss your cheek or not at all!!!
Does anyone else have an autistic child who isnt to the extreme that similarises with my son? Also is there anyone who believes there child to be 'different' but family members, generally the older generation such as grandparents or great grandparents dismiss your fears and say theres nothing wrong??
Hi
Yes, you seem to have summed up my son when he was little, as soon as born I knew something was not right. At 2 i suspected autism/adhd. No one took it seriously, because he was not like it all the time and most of the time the behaviour was put down as something else, hell grow out of it etc, he didnt.
He had no problems with speaking, went straight to walking. However, he was ext unpredicable, agitated, would thow the weirdess tantrums and was solitary, not a loving child and made going out extremly difficult. Grandparents, etc as you could see nothing wrong, although close friends has suspicions.
My son has now at 11 been seen by a paed who states has high functioning autism, too little too late as starting secondary soon and real probs kicking in.
My advice is to pursue, do not be put off by others, you know your child. dont leave it too late and be prepared to fight the system, take care
I have children with ASD and I also have Autism.So we will be learning from each other.
http://autismandaspergersinthefamily.freeforums.org/
will take you to a page full of help and resources uk and worldwide
the sections are
PDD/NOS
AUTISM
ASPERGERS SYNDROME
RETT SYNDROME
RELATED DISORDERS
MEDICATIONS
BEHAVIOURS
INTERVENTIONS PECS ,Facilitated Communication,cognative therapy
speech and language terms Action Songs for getting interactionPrintable PECS (if you need specific pictures please ask I will make them and post them for downloading)
Facilitated Communication,cognative therapy
speech and language , Action Songs for getting interaction and communication.
DAN, BIOMED, GFCF diet,allegies etc
and much more and much more.
SENSORY ISSUES
TOILETING
SOCIAL STORIES
feel free to add any that you have.or take any that you need.
SCHOOLS
UK/USA/WORLDWIDE
BENEIFITS AND ENTITLEMENTS and FINANCIAL AID
UK
USA
WORLDWIDE
OUTSIDE UK and UK RESOURCES
and more
I have a 9 year old daughter who i suspect of having mild autism, although i have been through the channels of having her assesed she dosent tick enough boxes to be diagnosed with autism, even though they agree that there is "something". I have never had the support of her school because even though she does have learning difficulties she is not distruptive and naughty at school and so obviously dosent stand out. They see her running about in the playground with other children and assume she is able to play. I see her in the playground and see a child who is tagging along with others and not actually playing with them. she seems to have so much anger and frustration within and leaves it till she gets home to relieve it. She has no compation for others and is extremley hostile towards her younger sister. She has difficulty in remembering to do simple tasks, especially if you ask her to do more than one at a time.I am at the minute going through a really difficult time with her and dont know who to turn to for help. I just want to know how to handle her behaviour so to help her in the long run. Even though i know there is an underlying reason for the way she is its hard to remember that when you are having to cope with it on a daily basis and find myself shouting at her which obviously only makes matters worse. Ive tried the dicciplinary approach, the ingnoring the behaviour, the trying to talk to her and right back to the shouting!! has anyone any advise on strategies they have used?
My son is 7 and is autistic-PDD and has ADHD. He was diagnosed at 3. He doesnt always play with others, we actually have a team working with him right now. He would be quiet during school hours, but he would come home and "act out" because he couldnt verbally tell anyone what was wrong. He will become agrressive and angry. The best test to have done is a neurological psych evaluation. It is about 8 hours long but they can pin point what is going on with your child. Ive also taken my child to the Child Development Unit to confirm his diagnosis and they can point you in the right direction on where you can get more help. My child just started getting help when he was in public school and I had to get doctors to write the diagnosis. The other option is homeschooling. My son will be homeschooled because he isnt learning like the other kids and there are so many distractions in the classroom. Its a great program, and if that is an option for you, its very good for autistic children. Just have to make sure you keep your child in some kind of social interaction with kids example would be girl/boy scouts. I hope this information can help you.
Hi Simba,
I am hoping that you have progressed further in your quest to get the right help and diagnosis for your son.
I can relate so well to what you have said, my son is exactly the same. It is so hard, especially when nobody will listen to you! My son is 5 and knew from around age 2 that he was 'different'. Since he has started school I find it really hard as he does what your son does and seems to store it all up for me when we get home! I have been told though that children with these tendencies have to try so hard in certain situations ie school to fit in etc.. that after school they let it all out and it's us that gets it!
I went backwards and forwards to my health visitors when my son was a baby as I was concerned about him violently shaking his head from side to side. They told me he would outgrow it by the time he was 3 and not to be concerned as it was surprisingly not that uncommon! I have an older son, he never did it but I thought ok, all kids are different and I waited for him to outgrow it. He still does it now.
I told the health visitors about the other things he does too: No affection, 1 extreme to the other, he's either really laughy, happy and playful or he is crying for no reason at all. There is no middle ground with him. Things having to be a certain way, his drink having to be a certain temperature, his socks would HAVE to be identical, 2 black ones isn't good enough, they had to be exact. I'd have to cut cotton off of his socks if he saw one inside out or he would get very upset about it, I mean hysterical. He can only have 2 buttons on his polo shirts for school, he'll flip out if the have 3. I told them that he takes all of his toys in his bedroom and lines them up in size order along his skirting board. The list goes on and on but you get the idea.
He was referred to a Community Paediatrician. The lady that saw him was awful. She was rude and made him do the most ridiculous things! He's not stupid! just has little ways about him! The whole thing was a joke and she said at the end after a really long quiet wait that my son is just difficult! What a waste of time, I knew he was difficult that's why I was there! I asked her too about the shaking of his head as this is what I am concerned about most and her answer was simply I don't know! Not I don't know but I'll send you to see someone that does or anything! Anyway, that was the end of that and nothing much happened until he started school and I mentioned things to his teacher. His teacher agreed that she had noticed a couple of things (nothing major) and since then the school has done a referral to CAMHS. They have sent a letter back telling us that my son doesn't meet the criteria and they would like him to be seen by a Community Paediatrician to be screened for ASD. So, now we're back to square 1! If last time is anything to go by it'll be a complete waste of time :-(
Please let me know how you got on as I see the date on your post is 2008. I would be really interested to know the outcome if any.
Regards, SA
Dear anonymous who posted on 17th December 2011. I have just read your post and you seem to have described our situation. My son is 11 years old and for a long time now has had problems with anger. To begin with I thought he was going through a tough time. My husband isn't his biological father and although his real dad is making an effort to see him more regularly now he would often go for months on end without making any contact. I also have health problems so there has been a fair bit for my son to cope with. As he has got older I have begun to wonder if there is something other than anger issues going on. I am lucky enough to have a brilliant gp and spoke to her to ask advice where I start to find a counselor for him to speak to with relation to anger issues. I asked if it could be something like mild autistic spectrum disorder and after talking a little bit she also agreed that although he didn't mark all the boxes it did sound as if there were some tendencies and advised me to start making notes of his behaviour and to talk to the school. She advised the school as being best place to start because I know they provide a counsellor like service for pupils and whilst the anger issues were being discussed they could also look for signs of asd. My worry about going to the school is that although since starting secondary school in September there have been a couple of issues he hasn't displayed the type of anger and aggressive behaviour we have at home. He is quite an intelligent lad but then at the same time seems to lack any common sense. My husband walked into our sons bedroom the other day to find him standing with both feet on the radiator to look out of his window which he had wide open. He didn't seem to think there was anything wrong with this despite us trying to explain the possible dangers. There have been many other similar examples when he just doesn't seem to think about the possible danger involved. As you described with your daughter he doesn't seem able to follow instructions and if you ask him to do more than one thing he forgets and has to be reminded. If he decides he wants to do something and we say no because we are busy or need to do other things, he gets really angry. He hits and kicks things and has been known on occasion to hit out at both myself and my husband and often hits himself. I am hoping that through talking with the school and gp we will be given advice on how to act with him especially when he is angry as we seem to have tried alsorts but without any real benefit. As he has got older we have tried talking to him,punishing him by taking privileges away,ignoring bad and praising good but unfortunately I often find myself shouting at him. At the moment we are trying a combination of things. If a situation arises and we can tell he is starting to get wound up we take a time out to give both him and myself or my husband time to calm down and try to stop the situation deteriorating. We will then try to discuss it with him and I often now try to get our son to say what he thinks happened rather than us just lecturing. We try to keep this part quite short so we don't lose his attention. If we feel that a punishment is needed we are trying to place restrictions instead of a complete ban. I am so worried we are dealing with things in the wrong way but as you said when you are dealing with it on a day in day out basis you often find yourself not dealing with things in the way you would like to. The more I read up on things the more I seem to be able to think he does show autistic tendencies but then I also start to wonder it isn't mild autism and perhaps it is through my lack of parenting skills and he is acting out due to his situation, pre teen years and because I have done something wrong and not taught him how to deal with his anger. If anyone has any advice I would appreciate it greatly. Many thanks
Some of these stories scare me. My sons pre-school headmistress approached me about my 3 year old - I've apologised to her for my rant which in short was "how dare you suggest my son may have issues" - She asked for my permission to refer H to an assessment centre which I eventually agreed to, that assessor has now arranged for H to attend a SEN centre and H's pre-school key worker spends five minutes with us after every school day to let us know how H got on. I assumed my early experiences were the norm but alas it seems not.
I'm now starting to move from denial to responsibility and hope the support offered to-date continues. I find it incredible how difficult and/or unprofessional some of your experiences have been and am now concerned that maybe H's support is not so certain through his life as I perhaps imagined. With this in mind, I am going to be the squeaky wheel and shall use my elbow whenever needed. I will update this forum every 3 months.
FYI: H's first appointment at the Special Education Needs Centre is in approximately 8 weeks where he will undergo a full assessment that will be used to design his 'action plan'.
Caveman.
Hi there you have just described my 11 year old daughter.iam very very frustrated.is there some way we could get in touch?
Debs
Hi Charlotte,I have an 11 year old girl that is exactly the same.I find everyday a challenge with her.I feel she is getting worse as she gets older.Her problems are socialising,anger issues,very frustrated,problems with comprehension,following instructions etc No-one can understands her which then leads to bullying at school and at home outside on the streets playing.I myself thought it was my parenting skills but i have tried every approach and no-matter what i do she reacts the same.I sat and had a convo with her telling her she can talk to me about anything thats bothering her but she never has eye contact when speaking to her and it went right over her head.Her school is no help at all,they think even though she walks about the playground herself at playtimes n lunchtimes and stands outside the toilets til the bell rings thats shes fine!!!!!!!!!!!! i had to fight to get her learning support for her comprehension but still doesnt get it on a regular occurance.My daughter was attending our local hosp for her migraines and i just happened to mention this to her ped so i have another app in July to discuss things further.iam at my wits ends :( Hopefully she'l be able to help
Debs
I came on here because I felt I was on my own but I have just read my situation twice now! My daughter is nearly 10 and is statemented in a main stream school, but from the age of 2 she has had anger problems mostly aimed at me, at the time we all put it down to frustration. As she has got older her symptoms have definitely worsened and when she hits she really does hurt. When I read about someone else's son standing on the radiator to look out of the window that is the sort of thing my daughter will do, I have found her trying to climb out of the window so now we have to lock her bedroom window, she has no awareness of what's around her. Sometimes I look at her and think actually she is doing well and really trying at school so am I just looking for things that aren't there. I am also at my wits end, I need help so thank fully I have a paed appt next week so hopefully thar will lead to something good for her. It breaks my heart to think she is not happy and because she can't express her own feelings she will very often repeat what she has heard, I don't know what is going on in her own mind.
She also finds it hard to settle at night, she will go up to her room and talk to herself for hours until she can't keep her eyes open. In her bedroom she likes to keep little things like bits of scrap paper or bits of material and stuffs them into her endless amount of bags, I wouldn't say she is obsessively organised but she does obsess about stuff and information, she needs to know what's going on all the time in everybodies conversations or films etc and she asks constant questions.
There are so many other things that i just don't have the time to list but I just hope someone can relate.
best of luck everyone x
My 5 years old boy has been diagnosed mild autism one week ago. I started to worry when he was about 18 month. It took a while (ages to me) before someone manage to put a name on his difficulties.. During that period wondering what could be the problem if any because I went from the feeling of 'everything is normal' to 'Oh my god he has it, i'm sure he has it!!! Most of the time I just tell myself that my boy was just unfortunately a lot like me = Bad temper, moody, versatile, emotionally intense, not liking much the outside world, very creative, a huge need to be on his one etc. Now?! I think there is a big chance that I have some spectrum as well.
I don't feel there is much support after the diagnostic, it's a very worrying time and no one to talk to but a helpline that is always busy, and some very confusing websites to me.
hi i have a 14 year old dorgther who has sleeping difficulties learning difficulties an behavioural difficulties suffers frew uver medcle problems allso mood changes of stats of high an verey low moods she is under a peada an mentle health team who now say she as autism triats i have been fighting for verey long time with doctors an peada but never make eny full dignoses of her problems she all so hates things out her ruten an shows sighns of ocd an becumes obsesive over things she can not keep a friend ship going for verey long an when does have a friend she is only able to have one friend at time she likes to be in her room most of the time by her self she missed a year out school cos of these problems she ad mentle brake down an wasnt able to cope with school so doctor sighned her out an now she is going to be back in school i have been left ith no choyce but to send her to school fot children with behavioual problems but she ant a norty child just diffront an no boddy seams to want to help her or dignose her im 90 persent sure she as autism but they dont lison she was 5 when i borght it to doctor attion she was diffront she is now 14 an still no one lisons she is verey behind an struggles to cope with every day things she on school action plus from time she started school till doctor sighned her out im skired for my dorgter an dont understand why she ant getting the help she needs or i need she is under soshle serveses due to year ago she was allso rapt what is it going to take for my dorghter to get the help surpport she needs she also says serton things chang how she fills such as coulers an tould the woman at mentle heath team she likes her brouthers play mate cos it makes sunds wich i didnt even no things are just getting worse


